4 Steps To Start With Personal Development – Special Parenting
I am very passionate about the subject of personal development.
It changed my life, and it became a way of living to me.
The biggest beauty in personal development is that it’s a never-ending process. You can always learn new ways of thinking, new perspectives you can take, and many different methods and tools you can use.
Whoever understood personal development and its purpose knows that it becomes like playing a game where the rules are very stable, simple, and permanent.
When I think about it more deeply, personal development has another great beauty: it teaches you to take your own responsibility for your life, the choices you make, and the deeds you do.
One of the biggest blessings in my life was the knowing that no one is doing things to me, no one has the power with their opinion over my life, and it is up to me whether I am going to be happy.
In almost all of the articles, I mention “personal development,” and I am recommending it.
I even wrote an article, “15 reasons why personal development should be a priority to you.”
First, let’s take Wikipedia’s definition for this term:
“Personal development is defined as activities that improve awareness and identity, develop talents and potential, build human capital, facilitate employability, and enhance the quality of life and the realization of dreams and aspirations. Personal development can take place over the course of a person’s entire life. This is not limited to self-help – the concept involves formal and informal activities for developing others in roles such as those of teacher, guide, counselor, manager, life coach or mentor.”
In my experience, personal development is not something that you should discuss; it’s something that you should try.
Here are the steps of personal development:
First on the list is acceptance. It’s making peace with where you are now in your life. It is what it is. Every day is a new day, and today you’ve decided to read articles like this and maybe hear something for the first time in your life.
Maybe you are aware that somehow you contributed to your current situation, but that’s not important anymore.
Accept everything that currently exists in your life: special child, marriage issues, loss of a loved one, bad relations, financial difficulties, a job you hate, disease, etc. Whatever it is, accept it.
That is how you start with personal development. From that point on, know that for each one of your issues, there is something you can do. Or there is a different point of view you can take
There is no way to live happy, peaceful, and joyful life if you haven’t forgiven yourself, your parents, or anyone who mistreats you or caused you pain.
First, let’s talk about you. Forgive yourselves for all the missed opportunities, wrong decisions, and bad judgments. Be ready to change for the better if that is what you want. But there is no point to bit yourself up for what was until today. I know, and you know that in any situation, you did the best you could.
The same goes for your parents and anybody else who hurt you and caused you pain. You don’t forgive to make someone a favor. You forgive to bring yourself to peace. In personal development, everything starts with us.
If you don’t do that, you may spend your entire life in resentment and bitterness. But if you understand that the things the other did were from a place of fear, and if you realize that they didn’t know better, you will free yourself. You would reach liberation. You will be in peace.
And for the record, forgive doesn’t mean to justify or continue relations you want to finish. It means wishing no harm to whoever hurt you and go on with your life.
Dr. Bruce Lipton said in his seminar: “Knowledge is power. Lack of knowledge is lack of power.”
Education doesn’t finish with graduating from college and getting a job. Education is something that we should continue our entire life. Because the most important lessons come later in life.
In school, they don’t teach us how to be happy, how to deal with criticism and other people’s opinion, how to manage our financial state, or how to think positively.
School is great, and it has its value. We learn there about discipline, responsibilities, and hierarchy.
But there is not one lesson about mobbing in a workplace, challenges in the relationship, comparing to other people, and chasing false happiness.
That’s why it is our responsibility to learn how to live. To find out that we have the right to fulfill all of our desires and dreams. That everyone is treating us the way, we let them to. It’s our responsibility to learn that maintain the same behavior will never bring different results to us.
But changing our bad habits day by day can get big and beautiful changes.
We should learn how to say “no” and dismiss our need to be liked by everyone when that will never happen anyway.
We should learn that we are the creator of our life. And a statement like “its fate,” “my parents didn’t love me,” “my spouse is cheating on me,” “my boss hates me,” “my child is sick”– are all excuses to keep living unhappy life and not take actions. Those are excuses for staying in your comfort zone.
For each one of these situations, you already know what to do. You can choose to be a victim, but that way, you never going to change your position.
We should learn how to be more understanding and compassionate. Because we receive exactly the same energy that we put into the world.
How to educate yourself? There are Google and YouTube full of people telling their stories and how they managed to live a happy life, practicing certain tools and methods.
There are seminars and workshops you can visit (ok, not right now, but you get what I mean. The current situation is not going to last forever.). There are thousands of books you could read and change your perspective.
Reprogram your mind
Whoever started and continued personal development have reached the point when they become aware of their limiting beliefs.
We carry programs and believes from our childhood. We get them from our parents and the environment. Some of those beliefs are good, but some are not useful to us. All beliefs that we carry about health, opportunities, love, possibilities, finances, changes, flexibility, and everything else – can be changed.
Even science today proves that our thoughts are creative. Our mind tends to bring the things in our reality in which we believe in. We get the proof that everything we believe in is true. That’s why we don’t get the result we hoped for, but what we believe we will get.
Let’s try to simplify: watch yourself what statement do you use during the day:
- money is a necessary evil;
- there is no true love these days;
- you can’t get everything in life. You have to sacrifice one for the other;
- there is no way to be happy in these stressful times;
- true friendship doesn’t exist today;
- I didn’t succeed, and that means I am a failure;
- I am powerless to change this and that;
Those statements are an indicator of the programs you carry. And clearly, programs like this don’t serve you. That’s why little by little, you should reprogram your mind and start saying that:
- money is freedom;
- of course, there is true love;
- I can be and have whatever I put my intention to;
- many people are happy; I can become one of them;
- there are a lot of people who can be my friends;
- doesn’t matter if I fail; I can try again;
- there is plenty that I can do in every situation;
And so on.
You will never find a happy and successful person who is content with their life to talk negatively and pessimistically.
The real beauty of personal development is that you don’t have to convince and explain to people how you can change your life for the better. Everyone can try it on their own and see.
Do you know who starts with personal development?
The person who, at one point, says: “I’ve had it enough. I’m done. I can’t live like this anymore. I’m sick and tired of myself. Something has to change.” That is the first click, the first impulse. It’s the decision to change.
Ever since I devoted myself to personal development and growing as a person, I’m running into great teachers from all around the world (thank you, Internet). And today, there is really no excuse why someone shouldn’t start working on themselves. There is so much information, only one click away, and so many books with stories of people who found a way to live a happy life. They teach other people how to do the same.
It’s all there.
And it is absolutely unnecessary to go to seminars to achieve success in whatever you want to achieve. If you can’t afford expensive seminars, that can’t be your excuse for not taking action. You can learn a great deal by yourself.
Personal development will give you clarity about your goals and why you want to achieve them. And it will give you the tools to stay committed and focused.